There Is No Reason

November 9, 2019 – 3 years and 4 months ago you died my Amazing Aaron and everything has changed. I hear and have read about how I am supposed to find the gift in the loss of you and I am dumbfounded that people have even come up with that saying. People have decided that to survive there has to be meaning, or that everything happens for a reason, or the countless other sayings that have been made up over the years to be OK with death. I am not OK with your death – I will never be OK with your death – there is no meaning or reason or gift in the loss of you… Am I grateful that you are my son? Am I grateful that you were here for the 19 years that you were? Yes, Yes, to both – every single day I am grateful, but I still feel your loss and I will feel that every single day as well. These pictures are from 2016 – the last year that you were here and only for part of the year. I didn’t take enough pictures – there are so many days that I missed the opportunity to take more pictures. The stresses of life and work and feeling alone and all the other stuff that we make up to be stressed about was dragging us down. None of that will ever compare to the stress or the pain of your loss – nothing…2016

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